So here I go!

Imagine, going to school without taking a book bag, packing a lunch, seeing your best friend or knowing when you would get to go home. That was school for me today. I'm a third year medical student. Today I began my first rotation, Family Practice.

I didn't have to take any giant binders or even my laptop with me, and forget those stupid notecards (dont' go far guys, I'll be needing you very soon...), it was just me, my white coat, stethoscope, and what I'd managed to cram into my head in the past two years, because seriously, the first four (AKA undergrad) don't count because I didn't learn a THING there to help me out yet!

The day started out okay. I didn't have to be at the office at some ungodly hour. She said to show up a little before ten. I thought I could handle that. I got up at 7:30 AM just incase. (ever the OCD med student). I took a shower, reflected on what I knew about life, what I didn't know about medicine, how overweight I looked in my clothes, how Dr Workman and his staff probably wouldn't care, how I cared anyway... forgot to eat breakfast until about nine. So far.. I was glad I got up at 7:30.

About nine I realized I needed to get ready to leave. I wanted to arrive early (the eager med student, ever early ever wanting to learn, wanting that honors mark, shows up early, early is on time as you know...) Walk to my car the first time. Realize I dont' know how to get there. Run back up to mapquest it one more time (I had done this before but was convinced of a better way... ) in route, left my ink pen on the desk... BIG MISTAKE ROOKIE MED STUDENT!!! Go back to the car... realize I don't have my cell phone... run back up again... its now 9:40.... good thing I got up 2 hours early... imagine when my day starts at 7 AM later this week...

I start to drive there. I have never lived in an area with so much railroad transportation. I crossed six tracks.... SIX at once. with NO markings as to when trains were coming or going... I sat there for 10 minutes praying to God Himself that He might wave me across.... finally I gunned it.... I did this each time I crossed the tracks.... this happened 3 more times.


I got to the hospital unscathed. The people there were amazing. My preceptor told me he expects me to be working at a level way above what I am. I told him I dont' even know what that means. I think he thinks I'm funny... I hope he doesn't think I'm an idiot.

Its interesting, a few years back I used to be so confident in myself. Medschool stripped me of that. I no longer think I am worthy of anything and I think I am terrible at everything. I can't even make sentences that are worth saying out loud most of the time.
Personal goal numero uno: If it isn't worth saying, just stay silent & make what I say mean something.

I should have probably made a goal up there sooner about getting ready in under 2 hours... I can get ready in 45 minutes... Today was special... Day one is always special...

Without violating any hippa /hippo whatever rules... I will say this... I got to take stitches out today and I was nervous to do it. I know that I will look back on this.. probably in less than 6 weeks and laugh about that... but the sheer responsibility of someone's health care in any form in my hands was mindblowing. Then later I learned that OMT is actually a "procedure" that we must log. I think I am going to be logging a LOT of OMT in my time with my doc. Thats one of the reasons I asked to work with him in the first place... he's from Kirksville, he's an expert...

but to equate OMT to abdominal aortic aneurysm repair as new-innovations does... is WRONG!

enough said.

I got off work around 5:15 or so tonight. and I have minus about an hour and a half been researching things that the fine doc has asked me to look up... I haven't done much reading of them, but i've done a lot of quality research.
Gol numero dos: Learn to read as I research; it will save time

alright, I think thats good enough for day one. I can't write about patients in an open forum, and I dont' really have anything else I can write on here publically.

Oh, random, living in a complex comment... sometimes I see into other people's apartments... I dont' mean to, and I really don't want to, but I do... and i see them working out... and I cheer them on from my apartment.